April 11th, 2018

Why is the thesaurus so anal?

Why are their so many synonyms for bad that have to do with feces? Crappy, shitty, stinky, poopy....not to mention all of the other butt colloquialisms. I guess that's just the way it is (no, I'm not gonna do that again, but Bruce Hornsby and the Range)

So, woke up around 3 am...these pills just ain't cutting the mustard. I had an appointment for a PET scan at 8 am that was scheduled by the radiation doc for "planning purposes".; meaning he could get a better look at the tumors for treatment. Immediately following, I had an appointment with the chemo doc to discuss that. The PET scan goes well. Then I get to the chemo doc...

He starts by reiterating my treatment plan. Yeah, yeah, yeah, let's do this fricking thing!! As we are talking, he gets the results of the PET scan. There are now masses on my liver. This changes everything, he says. Not only that, but the chemo pills take a week to get here, because they are so...whatever. So now he is flipping out. "Before we can start chemo, we need another MRI and we will need to biopsy the masses on your liver!" But they didn't show up on the first CT scan, I says. "I know, but if they are there than we have to change your chemo regimen" he whines. "You need to do more blood work, too" he moans. Fuck me, says I.

Here is the deal, I guess. The original plan was pill chemo for 5 weeks, along with radiation, then ripping my guts out with a clothes hanger, followed by ANOTHER 6 months of IV chemo. This would require a port to be installed on my chest. Well, if the cancer has metastasized to my liver, then he would do the IV chemo first. My thing is: I truly don't give a shit (everything is about the butt) anymore and want to get this started. I tell him to order the pill chemo and if we don't need it, ok, but at least if we do we don't have to wait another week for it. No. So we end it with another appointment for a MRI and possible a biopsy of my liver.

Then I get to go see the radiation doc, who I really like. Oh, in the interim, I told the chemo nurse, Bobbie Jo, that I was gonna go have a beer and stuff at BWW's, cuz it is close to SIH. She calls me while I am there asking if I am still in the building. No, I says, I am having a beer like I told you. You can come see me at my radiation planning appt in 30 minutes. Cue hollering. Cue me not giving a shit, again.

So I get to the radiation appointment, and he is just as flustered as I am. He is very concerned that if the tumor gets large enough to block the rectum, the 7 day death clock begins to tick.We go around and around and they all leave to talk about it. But my girl Tonica stays and asks me what I want. All I can says is that I want to get started on something. Anything. The pain and bleeding has to stop.. She says ok. That is what we will do.

So they take me back and get me mapped for the radiation machine (got tattoos in my hips for markers, lol) and the treatment starts on the 6th. MRI tomorrow for my liver (rather be a good one than have one, I guess). Got some new pain meds to try out, but didn't want to wait for a hour so I will get them tomorrow. All in all, a crappy day.....at least there is alcohol.